She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Randomize