why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
My life is pants optional.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
