So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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