quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
