it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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