The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
