i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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