I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
