going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
