Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
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