oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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