I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
