im gay
i know
yea but for you.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
