You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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