I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
