remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
