She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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