someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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