So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
