i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
