So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
