I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
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