ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I will be naked everywhere
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Randomize