She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
