you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
