If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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