Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
home. puking in laundry basket.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
