She said her name was "party"
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize