Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize