So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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