the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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