I'm drive I can fine osifer
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Randomize
