He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
