end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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