And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
