she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize