you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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