Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
