she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
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