One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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