I bet he comes in French.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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