please come you make the beer taste better
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize