i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize