i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
