he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize