Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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