All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
