so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
