This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
