she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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