so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Did you just see the Batmobile???
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
