My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
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