I wannas sexs uuuuu
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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