He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Your cock deserves a montage
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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