Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Boobs speak an international language.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
